Online Cancer Support Therapy in Winston-Salem, NC| Online Cancer Care Across North Carolina

No- not everyone should see a therapist, but most people benefit from talking to one. You may have the most wonderful family and friends, but you may find it difficult to discuss some of your fears and worries about your diagnosis (e.g., am I going to survive this diagnosis?). Having a neutral person can give you the space to discuss some of the more challenging aspects of your treatment, your present fears, and fears for the future.

There are several Evidence Based Treatments for Cancer Survivors which include the following:

• Acceptance and Commitment Therapy

• Meaning Center Psychotherapy

• Supportive Counseling

During the course of my career, I’ve attended workshops and undergone training with both founders of Meaning Center Psychotherapy (William Breitbart) and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (Steven Hayes). I often incorporate ACT and MCP into my work.

Yes! Remember, how I mentioned that cancer is like an earthquake. After you survive the earthquake, you have the ability to stop and think about what you’ve been through (i.e, the treatment). Many clients feel more anxious after treatment, because they realize how challenging treatment can be, and they realize how much they stand to lose with a recurrence. Fear-of-cancer recurrence is normal and may always be a part of your survivorship. We just don’t want it to impact your overall day-to-day life.

It can be beneficial for caregivers to work with a therapist who understands the challenges of caring for a family member during treatment. Caregiver burnout is a real thing. These are signs that you may be feeling burned out:

• Feeling constantly overwhelmed or on edge

• Irritability, anger, or resentment (often followed by guilt)

• Feeling emotionally numb or detached

• Anxiety that won’t shut off

• Sadness, hopelessness, or frequent crying

• Feeling alone or unsupported, even when others are around

• Chronic fatigue, even after sleeping

• Headaches, muscle tension, or body aches

• Trouble sleeping or staying asleep

• Getting sick more often

• Changes in appetite or weight

• Difficulty concentrating or making decisions

• Forgetfulness or brain fog

• Constant worrying or worst-case thinking

• Feeling like your mind never gets a break

• Feeling more like a nurse than a partner, child, or friend

• Loss of your own identity outside caregiving

• Feeling pressure to be “strong” all the time

• Guilt when resting or doing something for yourself

Wow. Let me say that talking with your kiddo about their cancer diagnosis is one of the hardest and important conversations you will ever have. Many parents fear using the word cancer will increase your child’s fear. However, research actually suggests otherwise. Children often sense that something is wrong, and would prefer to have truthful, accurate, and age appropriate information from their loved one.

Based on your child’s age, you should tailor the information to them, including simple and understandable facts.

• For example, you might say, “The doctors have found something in your body called cancer. They have medicine they plan to give you to help the cancer go away and your body get better. Sometimes, these medicines might make you feel tired or your tummy hurt, but we will need to take the medicine to help you feel better. I will be with you every step of the journey.”

For older children, you may want to provide more detail in the conversation. You should answer your child’s questions honestly and involve them in the treatment plan, when possible. You may want to ask them questions, such as:

• Do you have any questions?

• What worries you the most right now?

• Is there anything you’re wondering?

You should answer these questions honestly and directly use the word cancer during these conversations. Meeting with a psychosocial oncologist can help you with these conversations. I am a licensed therapist in North Carolina and have over a decade of experience working with cancer patients, caregivers, and parents of children with cancer.

Whenever possible, it is best to be honest. If you don’t know the answer to something, then you should say, “I don’t know the answer to that question right now. But, let’s talk to the doctor about it the next time we are at the hospital.” 

Always be honest with your child in an age appropriate way. 

Talking with someone with psychosocial oncology experience can help. I have over a decade of experience working with cancer patients in the Triad and throughout North Carolina. I can help you navigate these hard conversations.

Generally speaking, kids worry more about their day-to-day life and how their world is going to change. You should reassure them about the things in their life that won’t change, such as play-time with mom and dad. You should remind them of all the things that are going to stay the same, and that mom and dad will be there every step of the way. 

It can be helpful to reassure your kiddo that:

• Cancer is not contagious. Mom, dad, and friends can’t catch it

• They will still be loved and cared for. 

• Mom, dad, and the medical team are working hard to help them get better.

• When possible, someone will be with them during treatment

• They did not cause the cancer!

Coping with your child’s cancer diagnosis can be challenging. Many parents have an underlying worry that their child will die from cancer, even if they follow the treatment plan. One of the most challenging parts of dealing with a cancer diagnosis is the chronic uncertainty of the situation. On your own, it can be useful to practice mindfulness and establish set times to practice guided meditations. This is helpful because you learn to notice your thoughts, and that these thoughts are just thoughts. Over time, you learn to redirect your thoughts to the present moment. Right here, right now, your kiddo is okay. Your child is having to do hard things, but they are okay. Learning to focus on the present moment can help. 

Many parents find it helpful to talk with a psychosocial oncologist about their struggles. Talking with someone who understands cancer can help offload some of the day-to-day stresses. Therapy such as Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), and Mindfulness can be helpful during this time. I am a licensed therapist in North Carolina who provides online therapy for parents of children with cancer. In our work together, you’ll be free to discuss the hard things that you’re afraid to express out loud. I will hold space for your grief and process the loss of the future you had planned for your child, and we will learn skills to best cope with the present moment. Having a therapist can help you walk through this hard season. You don’t have to do this alone. Reach out today.